Mark Houston said "have you noticed there's a part of you watching yourself think.....have you noticed there's a part of you watching yourself feel"
Echart Tolle was viciously depressed as an adult and unhappy as a child. He awoke one night no longer able to tolerate the pain of his depression, he could no longer live with himself he said.
These two anecdotes illustrate a separation within man(and woman). What are these two parts, are we not defined as an individual? Part A watches what part B is doing. In Tolle, the actions of B could no longer be tolerated by A. This conversation exists within me constantly, who are these 2 people? Here's an example of such a conversation: I am to present the services of my company to a group of prospective clients who are executives for a national large media company.....
A: I will prepare completely, ensure my posture exhibits confidence, speak clearly. My proven intellect and experience will not fail me, god shall provide the rest, I have faith, it will be okay, a learning experience at the least, a great success at most!
B: I do not want to do this! What if they ask questions I don't know the answer to. I bet there will be a sadistic one in the group who will drill me with questions and eventually trip me up, I should lie and say I have a doctors appt that day so I can't go
Thus A attempts to guide B, telling it to calm down, etc... This struggle creates pain in the mind, one which causes the mind to become troubled. It gives way to anxiety, depression, panic and chaos. The alpha male, the confident man argues with the naysayers, the preacher of doom.
So what are we to do?
I define A as the spirit. That which is the energy put forth into the body. It is directly a product of god if you will or the energy and love of the universe. It is serene, undaunted by pain, all love and purity, it is forever and it is pure.
At this current moment I am tortured by my mind and ego. It feels like I shine a bit of light on the truth and one the ego and it panics, darts away and finds a new spot to hide in.
